Saturday, July 29, 2017

The Emoji movie is not only "Meh", but "Bleh"

Movie Title: 
The Emoji Movie

Grade:  D

Rating: PG, 86 minutes

In a Nutshell:  Meh. Rumor has it that this film was Sony’s last effort to make a good movie before going bankrupt.  I doubt that's true, but I have a feeling they’re not going to be posting any happy emojis when they see how audiences are reacting to this disappointing movie.

Unfortunately, It appears to be a blatant money grab, as well as a copycat of Pixar’s successful movie Inside Out (Theatrical)

Based on the idea that high schooler’s lives revolve around cell phones, the animated emojis live in a colorful, nonsensical world called Textropolis.  In fact, the narrator (Meh) exclaims cell phones as the “most important invention in the history of communication.”  I love using emojis too, but I love language even more...and real human interaction.

Uplifting theme: 
  • Individuality, express yourself
  • “Being #1 doesn’t matter if there aren’t any other numbers.” – Meh, Jail Break
  • “I’d rather have a real friend.” – Meh, hand
  • It’s OK to have a lot of different emotions.
  • Friendship, loyalty

Things I liked:
  • The talented voice cast includes T.J. Miller, James Corden, Anna Faris, Maya Rudolph, Steven Wright, Jennifer Coolidge, Christina Aguilera, and Sofia Vergara.  Can you believe Patrick Stewart plays “Poop”?!
  • Good music.
  • The parents of “Meh” talk in monotone, which is pretty funny, especially when you recognize comedian Steven Wright's voice who is absolutely perfect for his role.
  • The YouTube video of the kitten getting tickled got more reaction out of the audience than anything else in the entire movie.  

  • Tons of poop jokes.  Who doesn't love the poop emoji?  Some movie critics are using it to describe this movie. The poop emojis are in a lot of scenes and easy to write gags for.  I thought it was cute when the young poop followed his dad out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck on his foot.
  • There’s a quick look at WeChat, which Meh describes as “a whole other world.”  That’s for sure.  I’ve been to China twice this year and have been completely amazed with WeChat.  You can invite a friend out to dinner, make a reservation at a restaurant, call a taxi service to take you there, pay for dinner, and all without ever leaving the app.  You can even pay for vending machines, go shopping, shake your cell phone to win prizes, and soooooo much more, all on WeChat.  It’s like all of America’s apps built into one.
  • When you see The Emoji Movie in the movie theater, you’ll also get to see the animated short called “Puppy”, based on the characters from Hotel Transylvania.

Things I didn’t like:
  • Really dumb script and plot.
  • It’s just not funny.  When I arrived in the theater, kids were bouncing out of their seats with excitement.  Once the movie started, they became almost comatose.
  • Predictable, obligatory dance number at the end of the movie that fell flat.
  • The sub-plot of Meh's parents almost divorcing was bizarre.
  • A ridiculous amount of product placement.
  • Some of the dialogue is just absurd.

Funny lines:
  • “My mom just joined Facebook.  Can you believe she wanted to friend me?” – school girl
  • “We’re number two!  We’re number two!” – poop emojis
  • “What could a teenage boy possibly want to hide from his parents?” - Meh (T.J. Miller)

Dumb lines:
  • “We have business to attend to.” – monkey emojis
“What kind?” – Meh
“Monkey business!” – monkey emojis
  • “Words aren’t cool.” – boy’s friend’
  • “That’s what matters in life: popularity.” – High 5 (James Corden) 

Tips for parents: 
  • Your kids deserve a better movie.
  • Talk of piracy, skins, and a ton of social media programs.


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