Jason Bourne franchise still alive

Movie Title:     Jason Bourne

  

Grade:  B

Rating:  PG-13, 123 minutes

In a Nutshell:   If you’re a fan of the Bourne movie franchise, then you will want to see this movie, regardless of any critic’s review.  

I love Jason Bourne and Matt Damon, so I was looking forward to it, although I wondered what more the writers could possibly say or do to the story line.  The fact that it is “more of the same” is its strength AND weakness.

So, is this 4^th installment the last?  Who knows.  If this one makes any money, then you can bet there will be another one.   Who knew Robert Ludlum’s “The Bourne Trilogy” series would keep going?

Themes: 

• Personal rights vs. public safety
• Revenge
• “Privacy means freedom.” – Aaron Kalloor (Riz Ahmed)
• Cyber security
• Family

Things I liked:

• I love Jason Bourne kicking bad guy butt.  Forty-five year old Matt Damon produced the film.  You see a lot of pictures and even clips of him in his younger days.
• Tommy Lee Jones can always be counted on to do a great job playing a good/bad Sherriff/Director/agent in any film.
• Alicia Vikander is beautiful to watch.  She started out with a bit of a British accent, but then it quickly toned down to a believable American one.  She’s actually Swedish and a very good singer!  She won the “Rising Star Award” at the 2010 Film Festival in Sweden and even won the role of a Danish queen in a 2012 movie without knowing any Danish.  Her career is definitely one to watch.
• It was nice to see Julia Stiles again.
• I wanted to beat the crap out of Vincent Cassel, who plays a brutal, vengeful agent with Jason Bourne in his sights…literally.
• The car chase scene down the famous Las Vegas Strip was pretty doggone impressive.  The most unbelievable thing about that scene, however, is that it is absolutely impossible to drive down Las Vegas Boulevard that fast.  I live in Vegas and can tell you that it is ALWAYS crowded and cars inch slowly along the road bumper to bumper.  Ha ha  At one point, cars crash into the Riviera Hotel, which no longer exists.  Las Vegas is the Capital of Implosions and just demolished the "Riv" in June.  Check out this clip from the real life implosion. 
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• The film begins with some old clips from past movies in case you forgot what happened 9 years ago in the last flick.
• One thing I love about the Bourne franchise is that you get to travel all over the world in the movies.

Things I didn’t like:

• Does anyone actually like the “shaky cam” effect?  Every time there was a close-up, the jiggling around would begin.  That’s so annoying.
• Sometimes you have to read really fast to catch written words on computer screens or other documents.

·       At some point, almost every character in the movie says “Understood.”

·       The same flashback gets played over and over.

·       The same tense music and drum beats during almost the entire
         movie.
*       Some lines in the trailer weren't in the actual movie.

       

Interesting lines:

• “I remember.  I remember everything.” – Jason Bourne
•  “He’s seen things.  He knows things.” -  Heather Lee (Alicia Vikander)
• “What if he’s not coming for us.  What if it’s something else?”   Heather Lee
• “I know who I am.  I remember everything.” – Jason Bourne

“Remembering everything doesn’t mean you know everything.” – Nicky Parsons

“Tell me.”  - Jason Bourne

• “I volunteered because of a lie.” – Jason Bourne

“No, you volunteered because of who you are.” – Director Dewey

• “We’ve just been hacked.” – Craig Jeffers (Ato Essandoh)

“How bad?” – Director Robert Dewey (Tommy Lee Jones)

“Could be worse than Snowden.” – Craig      - By the way, there is a movie about Snowden that hits theaters on September 9, 2016.

• “He is involved in this somehow.  I can feel it.” – Director Dewey
• “You don’t know the truth about what they did to you.” – Nicky
• “You have no idea who you’re dealing with.” – Director Dewey
• “I’m trying to find another way.” – Jason Bourne

“And how’s that working out for you?” – Director Dewey

Tips for parents:   

• LOTS of shooting, killing, crashes, riots, and bloody hand-to-hand combat.  This is a very violent movie.
• Some profanity.

Paul Blart 2 disappoints

Movie:  Paul Blart Mall Cop 2

PG, 1 hour 34 minutes

Grade:  C-

In a Nutshell:  If you really like Kevin James (I do) and his physical humor (ouch!), you won’t mind the simple plot and weak script too much.  If not, you might want to skip this one.

One of the characters in the movie calls Paul Blart a “misshapen superhero.”  He was certainly a lovable character in the first movie, although this sequel  spends more time on the size of his cape than on his endearing, deluded personality.   Maybe that’s a good thing, because he becomes rude and obnoxious in this second one.

As Paul says: “Always bet on Blart.”  Unfortunately, the critics hate this movie and aren’t betting on it at all.

Uplifting Theme:

·         “We live as we dream.” – Joseph Conrad

·         Courage comes in all sizes.

Things I liked:

·         I finally got to ride a Segway for the first time on a San Antonio city tour back in February with my hubby and we loved every minute.  They’re definitely as much fun as Paul Blart makes them look.  He’s really good at doing tricks on them!

·         I thought it was funny when Paul pounced on a “bad” person and jiggled his large body, thereby smooshing the victim until the person gave up.  I used to do that to my kids.

Things I didn’t like:

·         It feels like an infomercial for the Winn Resort in Las Vegas.  (Beautiful hotel, by the way.)  At the end of the movie, you get to actually see Steve Wynn and his wife.  Sadly, they both look awkwardly plastic.

·         The movie also feels like a UCLA recruiting ad.

·         There are a lot of moments that are produced to draw laughs that fall flat.  I actually did hear a few people laugh in the theater a couple of times though.  Kevin James co-wrote the movie with his long-time writing partner, Nick Bakay.  When they were drunk?

·         Both Kevin James (Paul Blart) and Maya (Raini Rodriguez) look like they have gained a lot of weight since the first movie.  Of course, I have too…

·         There are two hotel workers who fall in love with Paul and Maya.  The unlikely romances are pretty forced and feel like slapstick.

Funny lines:

·         “Security is a mission, not an intermission.” – Paul   

·         “My body’s fine.  Turns out it’s my ego that got hit.” – Paul, after taking one of his many hits in the movie

·         “Is it me or did he smell like tobacco and vanilla?” – Paul

·         “What’s the motive?”  Do you have a lot of money?” – security guy at the hotel

“Define a lot.” – Paul

“Any?” – security guy at the hotel

“No.  I don’t have any.”  - Paul

·         “Is it warm in here or did I order my next uniform from Rochester Big and Humid?” – Paul

·         “It’s a bad day to be bad people.” – Paul

·         “Are you ok?” – Female cop

“Nope. But I’ve never been better.” – Paul

Tips for Parents:

·         Because the film takes place in Las Vegas, you will see gambling, drinking, and scantily clad women.  Welcome to Las Vegas, Baby.  I live in Vegas, so I always get a kick out of seeing views of the Strip in movies.  Thanks to all those tourists, we pay no state income tax!  There’s a scene when one of the guard’s wives is holding a GIGANTIC glass of booze.  That’s how we locals can tell who the tourists are…the locals are the ones carrying big bottles of water.

   

                 

Step Up All In: A for dope dance, D for dopey plot

Movie Title:  Step Up All In

PG-13, 1 hour 52 minutes

PG Grade:  A for dancing, D for plot

In a Nutshell:  The Step Up franchise always brings it when it comes to amazing dancing.  This 5th installment’s story line isn’t new or fresh, but the dancing is.  Who watches these movies for the plot anyway? 

The cast is a veritable“Who’s Who” from the popular TV show “Dancing With the Stars.”  (I’ve never missed an episode.)   The sets are bigger and the finale competition is terrific.

Uplifting theme:  Forgiveness.

Things I liked:

• Alexxa Brava (Izabella Miko) is stunning in all of her exotic costumes.  Check out her shoes and jewelry in all of her scenes.  Even her microphone is "bedazzled."  Did you know she is a ballerina from Poland?  Her legs are amazing.
• I can’t even begin to list the dope dance moves by the various dancers.  (Don’t I sound so hip and cool when I use the word “dope” in my blog?  Two of my sons are B-Boys, so that makes me cool by relation.)
• There were a lot of solos, which was kind of nice to see some of our favorites really shine in the spotlight.
• I saw it in 3D, which was fun, but not necessary for this movie.
• I can picture the dance numbers from this movie being turned into a Vegas show.

Things I didn’t like:

• Great dancing, but terrible acting.
• Nasty dance moves.
• Did you miss Channing Tatum?  Me too just a little bit... 
• As far as role models go, some of these characters are far from it.  The lead female dancer,  Andie West (played by the raspy Briana Evigan), makes a mess at her place of work and when the owner sees what she has done, she tells Andie to clean it up or get fired. Andie flippantly says "Clean it up yourself!" and storms out.  What a jerk.  The character, Monster (played by Luis Rosado), walks out in the middle of his job as well.  Yeah, I really want my kids to take responsibility like THAT.

Did you notice?

• Did you catch choreographer/producer/director Adam Shankman’s cameo as a carnival ride operator in Las Vegas when Sean and Andie go out for a walk at night?
• This feels like a big commercial for Caesar’s Palace, as well as for the Las Vegas Tourism office.  By the way, there are scenes taken at “The Fremont Street Experience” which is actually NOT on the Strip, but several miles away.
• Did you know that Ryan Guzman (Sean) has two dance doubles?  Isn’t that cheating?
• So You Think You Can Dance choreographer Christopher Scott looks so young that he is cast as one of the young guns in the dance crew LMNTRIX.
• I thought Andie's shirt with the black bathing suit top and the white strips in the back was super cute.  (The one she wears in the basement of Caesar's Palace when they're practicing before the competition.)  Briana Evigan is built solid as a rock.

Funny lines:

• Sean:  “Let me try this thing I’ve been imagining in my head.”

Andie: “That better be the dancing you’re talking about.”

• Jasper: “How come postickers taste so much better in Vegas?”

Jenny: “Because they’re eggrolls.”

• “So it begins…the drama, the passion, the Vortex.”  - Alexxa 
• "I have been known to get pretty crunk."  - Marcos 
• Jason (We know him as “Twitch”): “This is your new crew?”

Sean:  “Well, they ain’t my book club.”

Tips for parents:    You’ll see a lot of skin, especially Briana Evignan’s, who plays Andie West.  There is some great dancing, but also a lot of “dirty” dancing and crude moves.  Surprisingly, there is not much profanity.

If you missed the first Step Up movies, you can catch up on them with these:

Don't bother thinking like a man too

Movie Title:  Think Like A Man Too

PG-13, 1 hour 46 minutes

Grade:  D for dumb

In a Nutshell:  This movie is ridiculous and not in the “ha ha” kind of way.  It’s a raucous romp in Sin City while hypocritically preaching that the ultimate happiness is fidelity in marriage at the upcoming wedding of one of the featured couples. It’s an excuse to misbehave in the style of The Hangover or Last Vegas .  You can read my movie review of Last Vegas here.  Surprisingly, it's Rated PG-13 too.

Kevin Hart’s loud, whiny and frantic narration is annoying and it feels like the audience just paid for a cast party after their last movie.  There are plenty of clichéd moments from Tom Cruise’s Risky Business scene where Kevin Hart slides across the floor in a white button-up shirt, to a montage of the token white girl trying on different outfits a la Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman , to the ladies’ lip-sync music video for Bell Biv Devoe’s Poison  The token white guy in the movie is a nerd who wears a fanny pack.

It’s a shame that this talented and very good-looking cast didn’t have more substance to work with. There is nothing fresh and new, offering you plenty of eye exercises as you roll them for almost 2 hours.

Things I liked:

• Ummm…..not much.

Stupid lines:

• A slutty girl at the hotel pool asks “Are you in a relationship or something?  So am I.  This is Vegas, baby.  Lighten up.”    (Seriously?  Do people think that’s actually funny?)
• “Never say never in Vegas.”  - Kristen    (Seriously?  As if that’s actually good advice?)
• “Absence makes the heart and other organs grow fonder.”  - Cedric  
• “Tomorrow you can go back to the miserable and sexless existence that is marriage.”  - Cedric

Funny lines:

• The old, British butler states “I think we’re soul brothers from different mothers.”  An alarmed Kevin Hart says “I don’t think it’s like that.”

Tips for parents: This is not a family film and not really worth your time either.  It’s loaded with everything you imagine happens in Vegas.  Hey, I live in Vegas, so I’m not slamming my city.  I’m just sayin….not a family film.

The first film of this franchise is much better:

 

Godzilla proves to be a monster at the Box Office

Movie Title:  Godzilla [HD]

PG-13, 2 hour 3 minutes

Grade:    A-

 

In a Nutshell:   I love it when a movie trailer doesn’t reveal major plot points in an upcoming movie so that you’re pleasantly surprised.  Godzilla [HD] has all of the intensity, stunning visual effects, impressive sound design and suspense you’ve been wanting from this franchise for years.  Suspend your disbelief and enjoy the monstrous fun.

Box office sales proves that, just like Godzilla, this movie franchise won't die.

Uplifting theme: 

• There are good monsters and bad monsters.  Humans too.  Awww.
• There are nice examples in the flick of heroism, loyalty, sacrifice, and honor.

Things I liked:

• Disaster movie lovers will get a kick out of watching Las Vegas and San Francisco get destroyed.  Great special effects.  I loved the TV ticker line “Breaking News: Live Terror in Vegas!”
• The movie makes it current by including present-day concerns about compromised Japanese nuclear power plants being a danger to nearby communities and beyond.
• I liked how it tried to wrap the story around the 1954 Godzilla movie’s fear of the atomic age.
• Bryan Cranston makes everything better.
• Monsters Director Gareth Edwards is great at creating chaos and pandemonium.
• I watched it in IMAX 3D, which offers some moments when I really felt inside the movie.  At one point, I thought an audience member was standing in front of me and I almost asked him to move, but then realized it was the 3D effect.
• Go Army!
• (SPOILER ALERT)  I loved it when a “certain” monster glowed with fire inside.  Godzilla spews cool blue fire.
• I loved the scene where the skydivers dropped from the clouds, trailing red flares.
• Aaron Taylor-Johnson conveniently arrives in the right place at the right time to offer the ongoing thread that keeps the human story running alongside the monsters.  He’s likeable enough to get the job done as hero and provides another shout-out to the real everyday heroes in today’s U.S.Army.  My oldest son is an officer in the Army, so can I get a “Hooah!”?
• It was clever to show old movie clips in the beginning to bring newbies to the Godzilla franchise up to speed.
• One of the few funny moments of the flick featured some Japanese parents in an airport getting annoyed at their Emo kid.
• I loved seeing the city and aerial views of Tokyo.
• One of the best lines in the movie was when a Japanese doctor gets to say “We call him… Godzirra.”
• There are a few scene transitions that made the audience laugh out loud because they were expecting to see a real monster, but instead, saw a pet chameleon and a toy dinosaur.

Things I didn’t like:

• Audiences can’t help but compare this film to last summer’s blockbuster Pacific Rim .  They’re both fun, but Pacific Rim had some fresh elements that Godzilla [HD] can’t compete with (uber cool, digital kaiju, gigantic robot soldier fight scenes).  Click here for my review of Pacific Rim.
• While the 1998 Mathew Broderick version felt more like a cartoon, this one is full of drama.  In fact, it needs a touch of humor to offset the fact that it takes itself so seriously.
• The back story provided some meat, but was a bit contorted at times.
• Not nearly enough monster fight scenes.  Not nearly enough Godzilla.  He almost plays a supporting role.
• Dr. Ishiro Seriwaza does two things well in the movie: utter profound statements about Godzirra, and stare in disbelief with his mouth open.
• Thanks for the uncomfortable reminder that I live near Yucca Mountain...

Interesting lines:

• “The arrogance of man is thinking nature is under our control and not the other way around.” – Dr. Ishiro Seriwaza
• “The king of monsters is the savior of our city.”
• “Nature has a power to restore its bounds.  I believe he is that nature.”  - Dr. Ishiro Seriwaza

Tips for parents: 

• Loving married relationships instead of sexual content is refreshing.
• Very mild profanity that’s hardly noticeable because so many other things are going on.
• Lots of destruction and monster violence.  That's what you came to see though, right?

Last Vegas plays as Grampas Gone Wild

Last Vegas just came out on DVD this week, so I thought it might be helpful to review the flick and let you know what you're in for with a purchase or rental.

Movie Title: Last Vegas

Grade: C

In a Nutshell: This is one big Las Vegas party with an Oscar-winning ensemble cast that you can’t help but think is charming and adorable. The movie has its guffaw moments and comes off as The Hangover Part 63. As expected, there are a lot of age jokes as we watch some of our favorite leading men get old. Think Grampas Gone Wild.

Uplifting theme: My husband’s best friend recently died, so the life-long friendship between these four men really struck a chord with me. Friendships that endure the test of time and trials of life are truly priceless. The themes of love, forgiveness, and even good ole fun that creates memories comes through loud and clear.

Things I liked:
• I was impressed with how much the child actors looked like their counterpart adult actors. Nice casting!
• I loved the image when the men are coming down the escalator so that you only see their legs. The sexy torsos from the strippers in Las Vegas’ male dancer show “Thunder from Down Under” appear to be the actors’ upper body. It was a fun visual that only lasted a moment.
• The Morgan Freeman dance
• I thought it was hilarious when Kevin Kline had to put on his glasses to see the nude lady
• I’ve always enjoyed Mary Steenburgen and some critics say that she stole the entire movie.
• My kids laugh that Morgan Freeman is in every movie they’ve ever seen. No harm there. He’s a national treasure.

Things I didn’t like:
• I don’t like hearing kids swear. You experience that within the first minute of the movie. I understand that it sets the tone for the adult character’s personality, but I still don’t like it.
• Within the first 5 minutes, the kids steal wine and grind it in a pool. Parents, this is not a kid’s movie.
• Was Michael Douglas trying to look young and tan or was his character? Either way, I couldn’t decide if the fake color was funny or pathetic. Come to think of it, I couldn’t decide whether or not the entire movie was funny or pathetic.
• It’s too bad that so much acting talent couldn’t come together to create something better. Then again, as you get older, sometimes you just want to have whatever fun you’re capable of and don’t care anymore what other people think (another theme that is celebrated in the movie.)
• Sam’s story line reminded me a bit of The Big Chill . I have a really hard time thinking I would ever encourage my husband to sleep with other women. Uh, nope.

Funny lines:
• Dinner party at 4:15
• “This will be the first bachelor party that could be covered by Medicare.”
• “These Red Bull Vodkas are strange. I feel like I’m getting drunk and electrocuted at the same time.” - Archie Inspiring lines:
• “I was 17 five minutes ago. It’s winding up a little too fast.”     So true.
• “There ain’t nothing more important than loyalty and love between thugs.” = 50 cent

Things to look for:
• The disgustingly funny guy in the bikini contest
• Famous Last Vegas landmarks on Fremont Street and the Strip

Tips for parents: Much of the material is so inappropriate that the film should be rated R. You kind of feel like you just had a dirty romp in Las Vegas. I repeat…parents, this is not a kid’s movie. It is filled with profanity, scantily clad women and lots of sexual jokes, infidelity, transvestites, and inappropriate scenes.