Hotel Transylvania 2 preaches tolerance

Movie:   Hotel Transylvania 2

Rating:  PG, 1 hour 29 minutes

Grade:  B

In a Nutshell:   Colorful and silly, this family animation written by Adam Sandler takes a social stand on mixed marriages and tolerance.  Voice talents include a star-studded cast:  Adam Sandler, Mel Brooks, Steve Buscemi, Selena Gomez, Kevin James, David Spade, Megan Mullally, Keegan Michael Key, Fran Drescher, Molly Shannon, Chris Kattan, Dana Carvey, Rob Riggle, Nick Offerman, Jon Lovitz, and Andy Samberg.

Uplifting Theme:

·         Be yourself.  Let others be themselves too.

·         Mavis, the vampire who married a human, is on a mission for tolerance.  She says to her dad, Dracula, “Maybe you’ve let humans into your hotel, Dad, but you haven’t let them into your heart.”

Things I liked:

·         Considering it’s an Adam Sandler film, there is a surprisingly low number of body function jokes.

·         You’ll get it, even if you didn’t see the first one.

·         Dennis, the little boy, has the most adorable curly, red hair.   It served as a great gag throughout the movie as well.

·         The animation is clear, sharp, colorful and creative.
-     I admire how Adam Sandler keeps all of his old Saturday Night Live friends in work.
-     The movie reveals that Jonathan is from Santa Cruz, California, which  is the beach town near where I grew up.  Woo, beach boardwalk!

Things I didn’t like:

·         I only chuckled a few times.  Most of the laughs in the movie come from reactions to gags, pranks, and physical comedy.  The writing isn't that clever.

·         It ends with a clichéd dance party….not that it’s bad...it’s just predictable.

·         Mavis whines “Can we stop using the word ‘normal’?”  Apparently, we now live in a world where “normal” is bad and everything else is considered good.   

·         It demonstrates pretty well the entitled , younger generation that demands tolerance from everyone, yet doesn’t offer it very easily to others.

Funny lines:  

·         “From Prince of Darkness to King of Room Service…” – Vlad Dracula

·         “None of the parents better review this on Yelp.” – party performer

·         The young campers sing “Vampires will be friends forever…literally.”

·         “Michael, row your corpse ashore.” – Dracula

·         “I’m not a hippie; I’m a slacker.” – Jonathan

Things to look for:

·         Did you notice that all of the women in the movie have big hips and thighs?

·         Check out all of the things inside Blobbie in each scene he is in.

Tips for Parents:

·         Some of the monsters might be too scary for really young children.

·         Some fight scenes.

·         Some talk about “boobies”.

Missed the first one?  Check it out here:

Pixels helps you relive your 80's glory days

Movie:    Pixels

PG-13, 1 hour 46 minutes

Grade:  B-

In a Nutshell:  This is a world where Kevin James is President of the United States.   Need I say more?   I have real mixed feelings about this new Adam Sandler action comedy.  While it has many flaws, it DID make me laugh out loud a few times, mostly thanks to Josh Gad and his hilarious comical timing.  

Younger viewers will be mildly entertained, while their parents will get a kick out of 80's nostalgia.  As they say in the movie: “Start your gaming!”

Uplifting Theme:

·     The 80's rocked.
-   Everyone gots da skills in something.
-   We're better when we work together.

Things I liked:

·         The funny-man cast includes Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Josh Gad, Jane Krakowski, and Peter Dinklage.  The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship Of The Ring fans will be happy to see Sean Bean.

·     Adam Sandler’s character is a tech nerd, which reminded me of the cute TV show Chuck: Season 1 where the main character works for the “Nerd Herd”.  People are now embracing their inner nerd and it’s considered cool now.  Adam Sandler’s character says “For the record, I’m an amazing kisser.  All of us nerds are.  We appreciate it more.”

·         I grew up in the 80’s, so it was fun revisiting those good old days. There are a LOT of 80’s references that parents might have to explain to their kids, such as:  “Where’s the Beef?”, Sheena Easton, Polaroid cameras, and some of the people who show up as cameos (see my list below).
*  I remember playing most of the games that the movie featured: Donkey Kong, PacMan, Space Invaders, 

 Things I didn’t like:

*   It felt like everyone was acting.

*   The special effects weren't amazing.   Meh.

*   The script could have been stronger with better writing.

Funny lines:

Ludlow has most of the funny lines that made me laugh out loud.  Here are some of them:

·         “It looks like someone sent us the cast of Magic Mike.  Are you going to fight or dance naked?”

·         “I’m on an all protein diet, but I also do carbs.”

·         “You smell so nice, like the book of Genesis.”
          

Tips for Parents:

·         I have four sons who all love to play video games.  As any good mother does, I scold them when I think they’ve played for too many hours in the day, informing them that they’re wasting their time and that they should be developing more meaningful talents and skills which will help them in their future to get a good job and career.  Little did I know that my second son would actually grow up to be a character artist at Blizzard, one of the biggest video game companies on earth!  He has a great job and absolutely loves what he does.  Check out some of his recent artwork for Blizzard. 

Cameos:

·         Serena Williams

·         Martha Stewart

·         Dan Akroyd

·         Tammy Faye Baker

·         Fantasy Island host and “Tatoo”

·         Hall & Oates

·         Lainie Kazan

·         Matt Frewer as Max Headroom

Paul Blart 2 disappoints

Movie:  Paul Blart Mall Cop 2

PG, 1 hour 34 minutes

Grade:  C-

In a Nutshell:  If you really like Kevin James (I do) and his physical humor (ouch!), you won’t mind the simple plot and weak script too much.  If not, you might want to skip this one.

One of the characters in the movie calls Paul Blart a “misshapen superhero.”  He was certainly a lovable character in the first movie, although this sequel  spends more time on the size of his cape than on his endearing, deluded personality.   Maybe that’s a good thing, because he becomes rude and obnoxious in this second one.

As Paul says: “Always bet on Blart.”  Unfortunately, the critics hate this movie and aren’t betting on it at all.

Uplifting Theme:

·         “We live as we dream.” – Joseph Conrad

·         Courage comes in all sizes.

Things I liked:

·         I finally got to ride a Segway for the first time on a San Antonio city tour back in February with my hubby and we loved every minute.  They’re definitely as much fun as Paul Blart makes them look.  He’s really good at doing tricks on them!

·         I thought it was funny when Paul pounced on a “bad” person and jiggled his large body, thereby smooshing the victim until the person gave up.  I used to do that to my kids.

Things I didn’t like:

·         It feels like an infomercial for the Winn Resort in Las Vegas.  (Beautiful hotel, by the way.)  At the end of the movie, you get to actually see Steve Wynn and his wife.  Sadly, they both look awkwardly plastic.

·         The movie also feels like a UCLA recruiting ad.

·         There are a lot of moments that are produced to draw laughs that fall flat.  I actually did hear a few people laugh in the theater a couple of times though.  Kevin James co-wrote the movie with his long-time writing partner, Nick Bakay.  When they were drunk?

·         Both Kevin James (Paul Blart) and Maya (Raini Rodriguez) look like they have gained a lot of weight since the first movie.  Of course, I have too…

·         There are two hotel workers who fall in love with Paul and Maya.  The unlikely romances are pretty forced and feel like slapstick.

Funny lines:

·         “Security is a mission, not an intermission.” – Paul   

·         “My body’s fine.  Turns out it’s my ego that got hit.” – Paul, after taking one of his many hits in the movie

·         “Is it me or did he smell like tobacco and vanilla?” – Paul

·         “What’s the motive?”  Do you have a lot of money?” – security guy at the hotel

“Define a lot.” – Paul

“Any?” – security guy at the hotel

“No.  I don’t have any.”  - Paul

·         “Is it warm in here or did I order my next uniform from Rochester Big and Humid?” – Paul

·         “It’s a bad day to be bad people.” – Paul

·         “Are you ok?” – Female cop

“Nope. But I’ve never been better.” – Paul

Tips for Parents:

·         Because the film takes place in Las Vegas, you will see gambling, drinking, and scantily clad women.  Welcome to Las Vegas, Baby.  I live in Vegas, so I always get a kick out of seeing views of the Strip in movies.  Thanks to all those tourists, we pay no state income tax!  There’s a scene when one of the guard’s wives is holding a GIGANTIC glass of booze.  That’s how we locals can tell who the tourists are…the locals are the ones carrying big bottles of water.

   

                 

Grown Ups 2 is a waste of your money and time

Well, I hate to disappoint you, but Grown Ups 2 isn’t going to win any Oscar’s.  Big surprise, right?  While the first installment of Adam Sandler and his buddies pretending to be responsible parents was a fun, goofy flick, this return will bore and disgust you.  The script appears to have been written on a cocktail napkin while Sandler and his actor pals were all drunk out of their minds.

The all-star comedy cast shows that Saturday Night Live bonds last for many years.  I’m glad they’re all having fun and making millions together, but their humor really should be a little bit more grown up by now, don’t you think?  The film is full of crude jokes about barfs, farts, and every body part imaginable.  Fake boobs and coarse, exaggerated antics fill the screen, along with inane dialogue and gags that dwell too long.

Adam Sandler’s character, Lenny Feder, moves back to where he grew up with all of his buddies played by Chris Rock, Kevin James, and David Spade.  Other favorites in the cast include Salma Hayek Pinault, Maya Rudolph, Steve Buscemi, Colin Quinn, Jon Lovitz, Shaquille O’Neal and, of course, Rob Schneider.  Twilight lovers will cringe when they see Taylor Lautner playing a dumb, mean frat boy with lines that include such gems as “farthead.”

 

Adam Sandler attempts to recapture his youth by spewing out the most juvenile plot while insulting his audience.  It’s vulgar and definitely NOT funny.  Are all of the stars in the movie afraid to tell Sandler how bad this movie really is or do they simply not care?

PG-13 for being stupid and offensive, in addition to all of the other reasons.

Grade = F