Planes: Fire and Rescue doesn't reach movie altitude

Movie Title:  Planes: Fire & Rescue

PG, 1 hour 24 minutes

Grade:  C+

In a Nutshell:  You know when you make a Xerox copy of another actual Xerox copy and the quality gets worse each time?  That’s kind of this movie. The first Planes movie was a spinoff of the successful Cars franchise, but landed with a thud.  So what’s a movie studio to do?  Make a sequel!  No doubt the merchandising for little boys will be big.

For a movie about airplanes, it just doesn’t quite reach the altitude we all wish it did.

If your kids loved the first Planes, then go for it; you’re in for more of the same.  If you and your kids were bored out of your minds the first time around, skip this one.  You can read my movie review from the first Planes movie here.  Go watch Frozen again.

Uplifting theme: 

• Heroism
• Friendship
• Responsibility

Things I liked:

• Every animated film is better with the awesome voice talents of Patrick Warburton. Seriously.  Put him in everything.
•  The scenery was beautiful as “we” flew over deserts, mountains, and meadows.
• It’s better than the first Planes , but that still doesn’t make it an actual good movie.
• It’s definitely geared towards the tots.   
• It’s always fun to hear the lovable voice of John Ratzenberger.

Things I didn’t like:

• There were quite a few sexual innuendos intended to entertain parents, such as “How’d you like to rub tires?” and “We wore off the treads on our honeymoon” and “Yeah, they’re real.”    Not classy.
• I love Modern Family’s Julie Bowen and was happy to hear her voice the character of Dipper.  Unfortunately, I didn’t like Dipper at all.  She’s an airplane who constantly throws herself at Dusty for some cheap laughs.  Great role model for little girls, eh?
• I’m kinda tired of the obligatory fart jokes in lil tyke flicks.
• I got a little dizzy with some of the aerial dips and tricks.
• The most emotional scene was one with two old RV’s who expressed their love for each other.  Sweet, right?  Well, yeah, except their loving words were spoken in between inappropriate sexual innuendos and winks towards the parents. 

Did you notice?

• The planes and cars watched a “George Lexus” movie.   (George Lucas)
• Later they watched “CHoPs”..."139 episodes of lawbreaking love".... like the old CHiPs: The Complete First & Second Seasons .

Funny lines:

• “It’s a mysterious mystery.” – little bulldozer
• “This is so exciting, I’m going to overheat.” – random car in a group scene

Tips for parents:   I thought some of the fire scenes were scary and could frighten little ones.  Otherwise, the movie is mostly harmless fun.

Planes takes a nose dive for Disney

If Planes was about a bomber, then it would be mission accomplished. The voice talents of Dane Cook, Stacy Keach, John Cleese, Brad Garrett, and Priyanka Chopra are the best things about the movie Planes, a Disney release, but NOT a Pixar production.  It is Prana Animation Studios that put this one together.  Not exactly a household name, but they’re the ones who released Tinker Bell and Secret of the Wings (another Tinker Bell movie) straight to DVD release.   Unfortunately, the quality of this film reveals its history.

Planes was originally created to be a direct-to-DVD release, but when little ones clamor to see a summer flick with a giant tub of buttery movie-theater popcorn, why not squeeze more money out of it and slip it into the theaters first?  Ohhhhh, now this movie makes more sense.

The movie begins with the title “From above the world of Cars” hoping the Disney connection will help this movie to soar to megabucks.  It flops. Cars was somewhat unique and successful, and although Planes has a similar look, it doesn’t quite make it off the runway. Without Pixar’s humorous magic, the audience didn’t laugh for almost 15 minutes.  I don’t know if any parents ever did.  The humor is definitely geared towards younger children, almost at the parents’ expense.  The simplistic underdog story lacks the sophistication to entertain bored parents, yet provides endless stereotypes to offend them.

Dane Cook voices Dusy, a crop-duster who dreams of becoming a racing plane, has a secret fear of heights.  Kinda lame, right?

While most movie critics consider this film to be a soulless cash grab, there are some visually colorful aerial views of landscapes, although older folks may get dizzy in the 3D version.  (I’m showing my age.)  Little ones who love airplanes will be in heaven and the merchandising profits are sure to please Disney. The “believe in yourself” ending is predictable and unoriginal.  I mean, we just finished watching Turbo a couple of weeks ago.

It’s a disappointing movie theater trip, but at least you got your buttery popcorn fix.  Little ones will enjoy it.  Parents will endure it.  Are we going to see “Boats the Movie” next?

Grade = C