Movie Title: Assassin's Creed
Grade: D
Rating: PG-13,
116 minutes
In a Nutshell: I’ve
never played this popular video game, but I was excited to see it, because my 4 sons have
played it and the movie partly takes place in Spain, where I lived for 2 years.
This action film features actors I really like: Academy
Award nominee Michael Fassbender, Academy Award winner Marion Cotillard, and Academy
Award winner Jeremy Irons. With such a
pedigreed cast, you would think this would be an incredible movie. Alas, it falls short, like most video game
movies.
Uplifting theme:
- Interesting
question: Are people born with a predisposition to violence? What do YOU think?
- “People
no longer care about their civil liberties; they care about their standard
of life.” – Ellen Kaye (Charlotte Rampling) Sadly, I think that’s true.
- Free will, choices, good vs. evil.
Things I liked:
- The
look of the movie feels like the video game.
- There is a lot of impressive Parkour action, although some of it looks fake. The stunt work was really great.
- It's imaginative and could have been really good.
- Things I didn’t like:
- Cal
Lynch only goes into the past three times, which is lame because that’s
what people are going to the theater to see, not the boring present.
- There
were some scenes with a lot of annoying drum beats.
- There were a lot of dust storms that got in the way of the audience being able to see the Spanish landscape and what was happening, especially in the beginning.
- There
is a lot of mumbling, making it hard to understand what everyone says.
- How
exactly is that elusive Apple of Eden supposed to control free will? And the way to cure violence and anger
in the world is by killing a bunch of people? What the…?
- The
plot is pretty nonsensical and confusing with frustrating story choices.
- The
movie ends with a dangling thread to set up a sequel that most people probably
won’t watch.
- The
editing is super frustrating, because it keeps cutting to different angles
really quickly and you don’t get to enjoy the action as much.
Interesting lines:
- “Why
the aggression?” – Sofia
“I’m an aggressive person.” – Cal Lynch
- “You
turn to violence. I turn to
science.” – Sofia
- “Love
makes us weak.” – Maria (Arieane Labed) Do
you agree with that statement?
- “Tell
my father I’ll see him in hell.” – Cal
- “What
do you want from me?” – Cal
“Your past.” – Sofia
- “We
work in the dark to serve the light.
We are assassins.” – Cal Lynch
- “We’ve been looking for solutions. You’ve eliminated the problem.” – Rikkin
Funny lines:
- “Violence
is a disease, like Cancer.” – Sofia
“Violence is what kept me alive.” –
Cal
“Well, technically, you’re dead.” –
Sofia
- “You’re
going to lead them right to it.” – Nathan (Callum Turner)
“No, I’m going to eat it.” – Cal
- “I’m here to be cured of violence. Who’s going to cure you?” - Cal
Tips for
parents:
- You
see people being burned at the stake during the Spanish Inquisition, although the shapes aren't outlined very clearly.
- Lots
and lots of fighting, stabbing, and other violence.
- There
are subtitles that move pretty fast.
- The
video is rated for Mature audiences, intended for ages 17 and up. That alone might help you decide if you
want your kids to watch this.
- 1 F-bomb
@trinaboice
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