Vampire Academy now on DVD for those suffering Twilight withdrawals

The newest DVD to hit store shelves this week is:

Movie Title:   Vampire Academy

PG-13, 1 hour 45 minutes

Grade:   C-

 

In a Nutshell:   Juno meets Harry Potter meets Twilight meets Mean Girls meets terrible movie.  It could have been fun if it were designed to be a spoof.  Alas, brothers Daniel and Mark Waters have created crass characters with lots of hormones and little class.  It could be considered a guilty pleasure if you’re a teenager girl who has read the book and can’t get enough of vampire flicks.

 

Uplifting theme:   In the words of (NO spoiler alert): “Blood is what connects us all.  Blood is sustenance.  Blood is family.  Blood is pain and blood is death.” 

Things I liked:

• Ummm…

 Things I didn’t like:

• Snarky dialogue that tried too hard to be cool.
• Monologuing villains
• The ending leaves an opening for a sequel.  Please, no!

 Funny lines:

• “Stopping is for losers.”  -  Rose
• “A female, especially one who lives off of blood and magic, is going to have her mood swings.”  - Rose
• “They say Dimitri is a God.  Well, I’m an Atheist…an atheist with a big gun.” = Spiridion
• “Please don’t say Vampire Academy.  You know how I feel about the V word.” – Lissa Dragomire
• “Weird doesn’t begin to cover it.” – Rose
• “Stop staring at each other all gooey-like.”  - Rose
• “There’s a fine line between concerned and stalker.” - Rose

Tips for parents:   Lots of sassy words on the verge of profanity, inappropriate topics for young kids, pre-marital relations, talk of losing virginity, blood, violence.  Maybe the books are better?