Monday, February 27, 2017

Fist Fight showcases the worst of American high school

Movie Title:    Fist Fight

Grade:  D for don't waste your time on this garbage

Rating: R, 1 hour 31 minutes

In a Nutshell:   #TeacherFight

This filthy movie features about 947,633 moments of profanity, bullying, drug-use, porn, and a huge variety of inappropriate and lewd behavior by high school teens AND adults. 

Uplifting theme: 
  • “It takes courage to grow up and to become who you really are.”   e.e.cummings
  • “Words are always going to matter.” – English teacher
  • “Actions have consequences.” – Ron Strickland (Ice Cube)
  • As I always tell my 4 sons, “Be. A. Man.”
  • If you don't stand up for yourself, who will?

Things I liked:
  • Andy Campbell is the perfect wuss.
  • Jillian Bell is hilarious, but inappropriate 99% of the time.
  • Christina Hendrick smolders, as always.
  • Occasionally funny pranks.  I was Senior class president of my high school and planned an awesome Senior Prank.  I sent home letters to all the parents of seniors, explaining that the students would have a particular day off school for some legitimate-sounding reason, forging the principal's signature.

Things I didn’t like:
  • There has to be premise for the fight, but Ron Strickland (Ice Cube) throws a temper tantrum in a classroom, destroys school property, and then picks a fight with another teacher.
  • Tracy Morgan always plays the same character in everything.  I walked past him in an airport once and said, "Hey!"  He answered back, "Hey yourself."
  • I hate the expression “Snitches have stitches.”  I’ve heard students say that before.  It encourages the lack of consequences. 
  • I hated the talent show where little elementary school student Ally (Alexa Nisenson) drops a million F-bombs.  NOT adorable.
  • I chuckled a few times, but it’s mostly not funny.
  • Ice Cube was good, but he pretty much plays the same character in everything he does too: tough, scary guy matched up with a weasely light-weight who plays the comic relief.

Funny lines:
  • “No meth period.” – Andy
“When I’m on my period, don’t do it?  That’s when I need it the most.” – Holly
“Holly, this has got to stop!” – Andy
“Cuz it’s a gateway?” – Holly
“It’s the finish line!” – Andy
  • “The guy’s a virtuoso.” – janitor
“That doesn’t seem so scary.” – Andy
“You didn’t see his eyes.” – janitor
  • “Where do I get drugs?” – Andy
“You’re in a public high school in the United States of America. There couldn’t be a better place to get drugs.” – Holly
  • “Whoever dies first haunts the school!” – Holly 
Tips for parents: 
  • This is a true Rated R movie that is not family-friendly viewing.
  • Tons and tons of profanity.
  • Tons of inappropriate images of porn, underage sex talk, and masturbation.
  • It makes American high school look like it’s filled with complete drug & porn addicted delinquents.

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